The Bachelor 11: Two Tough To Decide For Brad
Commentary and Scoreboard by Donna Emery
November 6, 2007
This week on the Bachelor, Brad had three wonderful days and three intimate nights with the ladies, and by the end of the episode the editing has me convinced that he could very well choose either one of them.
I can honestly see it going either way.
One of the many consistent features of the Bachelor shows - past and present - has been skillful editing. I've been watching from almost the first season, and I've admired the way that the show likes to keep us guessing. Even when photos are discovered, those photos have been known to be reversed. When comments are aired in commercials we never know whether they'll be said in an upcoming episode and whether they'll be said to the person that he's shown talking to in the commercial. But up until now, I've usually had a strong conviction going into the final week as to who the Chosen One would be. I'm proud to say I've been right every time since Jen Schefft's "Bachelorette" season.
This time, I'm willing to admit that I could be wrong.
I saw three very different dates in Cabo, and they showed Brad interacting with these three very different ladies. It seems that Brad saw something alluring in each of the three of them, and had the task of evaluating which of the three had the least amount to offer him overall. That he decided to eliminate Bettina was no surprise to me; him saying that he didn't see who she was came as the surprise. I think Bettina showed him - and us -clearly who she is. She is a lovely, mature woman and I think she put her feelings right on the line. Her honesty became an issue between her and some of the other ladies; she spoke her mind about the seriousness of marriage and the unlikelihood of being able to discover a marriage partner in six short weeks. She was also blunt about her feelings for a date. Disliking a date didn't mean she didn't like Brad, though Jenni was quick to find fault with her. Bettina tried her best to show her feelings for Brad. Bettina didn't hold herself aloof; she just didn't emanate the depth of feeling that the other two ladies did.
In contrast, Jenni exudes warmth and depth. During the first weeks, I thought that Jenni was "there for the wrong reasons" due to her modeling portfolio and the frequency of her laugh. Over the weeks of the competition, I have changed my mind. She is as playful as a kitten and as sweet as cotton candy. I think that she's showing Brad - and all of us - who she is, and it's easiest for her to express herself in her affections. And Brad isn't a fool; he's enjoying it as one would enjoy a scrumptious dessert. Her handling of the Fantasy Card - pun intended - was classic Jenni: irrepressibly fun and straight to the physical expression of her commitment.
But however much Brad is enjoying his "dessert", I don't know if he wants to have a lifelong diet of "dessert." She's sweet and she's charming, but does she have the maturity that marriage demands? Though I think it might be possible that she could develop it, and that her devotion to Brad might cause her to do so, I just don't think that a year apart from Brad while she dances and pursues her career would be an ideal setting for her to develop it.
In my opinion, it's the connection that he made with Deanna that will endure. Though he spent more time kissing Jenni than he did with all the other ladies combined, I think that was because it was the easiest thing for Jenni to do - and who was Brad to say no?
I've seen Deanna's bluntness and I've seen her strong personality, but I think that her frankness has the potential to become a sounding board for Brad's need for a partner instead of a toy. I think Brad has been sincere in his search for a wife, and I think his sincerity will best be matched by Deanna's. I saw such tenderness when she told him that he has her heart. I saw equal tenderness when he asked her if she really meant it when she said she was in love with him.
In addition to attraction, maturity and fun Brad has often stated the importance of family. He wants a woman who appreciates the importance of family - and, by extension - a woman whose family would be welcoming to him. No matter what Bettina said to try to ameliorate the her family's negative reception of Brad and how much she tried to play it off as their concern about her moving away, it was clear that the negative effects of that visit were still on his mind, in Cabo. I don't think that anything less than a video apology from her parents and an engraved invitation to dinner would have repaired their relationship despite Brad and Bettina's best efforts. I think that Bettina's family was as much as part of Brad's decision as her inability to show him what he needed to see.
Both Deanna and Jenni's families were wonderful. I think that either of those families could offer him the sort of closeness he craves, and so although I loved Grandma's bluntness and think Brad would enjoy sparring with her at family functions, Grandpa and his ouzo would be an equal attraction. I remember Brad saying, at Deanna's house that he felt as though they were "husband and wife at a family reunion." I think that says it all.
In the end, it's Brad who must decide and right now it's really hard to guess how that will go. I enjoy guessing and I like to be proved right, but I can honestly say I won't be upset if he chooses Jenni. I could see him being happy with her and I would wish them well - though I'd be sad for Deanna.
As I read the various "Bachelor" forums, I enjoy reading the comments of the many fans and enjoy seeing them caught in the process of trying to figure out the ending. One of the many controversies that's been recently mentioned is the inclusion of a glimpse of a woman in a red gown, coming out of a limousine. No clue is given as to who it is; indeed, we hear Chris Harrison inviting us to wonder who it could be. I've heard speculating that it might be last season's Bevin, since the dress looks the same as the one that she wore to the Final Rose Ceremony. I don't know why Bevin would be at Brad's Rose Ceremony, but it's been fun to speculate this and the many other "clues" that the producers have seen fit to bless us with.
Although it's really tough to make a decision, here's how I think they now measure up, in the race for Brad's heart:
DeAnna - 25 - a realtor from Newnan, Ga
Current Ranking: 1 - Previous Ranking: 1
After giving it a day of thought, I still think it's going to be Deanna. I see something substantial in their interaction, and if words can be trusted the ones he said to and about Deanna were telling. He admires her independence yet treasures her softness. She's got the same respect for family that he yearns for - and the kind of personality that will make his life interesting. His affection for her seems deep and sincere. She's is the true embodiment of Brad's desire for a woman who he can truly share all of himself with. He said that he could see a lifetime with Deanna, and I think he really meant it.
Jenni - 27 - a Phoenix Suns dancer from Wichita, Ks
Current Ranking: 2 - Previous Ranking: 2
I can't deny their chemistry. Who wouldn't like such a warm and open admirer? Brad has liked her from the beginning, and he easily slipped into a very primarily relationship with her. But although he likes her, and enjoys her company and her affection - I think that's all that there is between them- at least, on his part. Jenni is a ray of sunshine and Brad would be a fool if he didn't let himself be warmed by it. But although he can't deny the pleasure that he feels with her, I don't see the substance in their relationship. Jenni may say she loves Brad - and I don't doubt her sincerity. But her first love is obviously dancing, and I don't know how soon she'll be ready to give it up to devote herself to Brad. Though she's a sweet girl and she deserves a wonderful guy, I don't think that guy is Brad.
Bettina - 27 - a realtor from Hermosa Beach, Ca
Eliminated: Week 7
I've seldom seen someone go so far in this show and be so collected when she's going home. I don't doubt that Bettina had sincere feelings for Brad, and I'll even admit that Brad was very attracted to her. She's a lovely lady and it's easy to see what he saw in her. But with her family's antagonism combined with her inability to translate her words into chemistry, Brad didn't have much choice but to let her go. I wish her the best and pray that she finds the happiness that she deserves.
Sheena - 23 - an internet marketer from Walnut Creek, Ca
Eliminated: Week 6
He tried his best to like her, and he was certainly charmed by her. But in the end, I think her mom may have freaked him out. This sweet and lovely lady just didn't inspire the same chemistry in him as the others did. I wish her well - she's a sweet lady who deserves lots of happiness.
Hillary - 27 - a registered nurse from Philadelphia, Pa
Eliminated: Week 5
What part of "we're just friends" did she not understand? I actually felt sorry for her as she rattled on about how she wanted him to "ravish" her and do other bleepable things. She seems like a nice lady and I wish her well but her over-the-top emotions made this is a difficult episode to watch. If she'd been listening, she would have heard him warn her. Too bad she didn't.
Kristy - 29 - an acupuncturist from Chicago, Il
Eliminated: Week 5
It seemed as if she knew from the beginning of the episode that she was going home. Her interactions with Brad were minimal and her smile said she was just marking time.
Estefania - 26 - an executive assistant from Atlanta, Ga
Eliminated: Week 4
He loved her smile last week, but he didn't feel the connection this week. I liked Steffi but he sent her home. She says that it's hard to get through her wall, but I didn't sense one. I wish her luck.
Jade - 24 - a boutique saleswoman from Nashville, Tn
Eliminated: Week 4
I think he liked her, but it turned out that he liked Deanna better. She and Deanna rubbed each other the wrong way, and Jade lost out on her chance to continue. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
McCarten - 26 - an accountant from San Diego, Ca
Eliminated: Week 4
He had the least interaction with her this week, and I think that he found less and less of a connection. She seemed a bit too serious for him.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sarah - 23- a bar manager from O'Fallen, Il
Eliminated: Week 3
She was doing fine with Brad until she failed to spot his twin. I think he was a bit regretful about sending her home. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Solisa - 25 - an esthetician from Georgetown, Tx
Eliminated: Week 3
She was a bit too much of a free spirit for Brad and she'll probably have no trouble finding a guy who doesn't mind her being who she is. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lindsey - 25 - a model from Livonia, Mi
Eliminated: Week 3
She said that she'd thought there was a connection between them but it wasn't strong enough for her to realize that Chad wasn't Brad. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Michele - 30 - a realtor from South Brunswick, NJ
Eliminated: Week 2
It's too bad that she didn't get to go on one of the dates because of her accident, and also too bad that she had to go home. I didn't see a connection between them but he certainly treated her attentively. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Erin - 25 - a publishing saleswoman from Tampa, Fl
Eliminated: Week 2
I didn't see a lot of interaction between them, but I didn't see it between him and some of the ones he kept, either. I wish her good luck. She seems like a nice girl.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mallory - 24 - a nanny from Honolulu, Hi
Eliminated: Week 2
He seemed to think she was beautiful and adventurous, but he didn't give her a rose. It's hard to say why. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Next week, the "Women Tell All" will bore us to tears with a rehash of the season while we keep on guessing which one Brad will pick. There's always a few entertaining moments on this show, but all we really care about is which one he'll choose - and what's up with the Lady In Red? The way this season is going, the Lady in Red might turn out to be Jenni's Grandma! Tune in and join the fun next week, and then stay on the edge of your seat until we finally find out who Brad chooses.
Donna is a nurse and teacher, and a mother of 5. She lives in Pennsylvania and is admittedly addicted to many reality shows. You can reach her at mrsed4ever@yahoo.com.
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