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Big Brother: Jen-tards, Ninja Turtles, and Redemption, Oh My!
Report and Commentary by Emma Brand
July 18, 2007
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When Eric said "You can't spell America without Eric," I had one of those Jen moments where I tried to talk myself into believing that someone is reading these little commentaries and feeding suggestions to Julie (better questions) and Am-Eric-A so they can improve. But Am-Eric-A is still annoying and Julie does not appear to have eaten more than half a grapefruit since last we saw her, so it was probably just wishful thinking on my part. If they were really listening, Eric would have voted himself out and Julie would have called out Joe for being worthless, so I got over my momentary lapse rather quickly.
The live vote was crucial because we got to see the Mrs. Robinson "alliance" crumble before our eyes. Kail, the so-called leader, voted for Dick, throwing off Julie and her cue cards and then when Zach jumped the gun, voting before he was told, Julie was equally unprepared. That was pretty good. I like to think if I was in there I would definitely do something like that to tweak America's most underweight reality hostess. The only vote for Joe to stay came from Kail. So she not only is dealing with being away from her multiple businesses. Now she is heading up what became the most short-lived alliance I have ever seen. If you are reading this, and you work for Kail, wait until next week when she gets home, and then immediately ask for a raise.
In just one week, Kail went from what looked like one of the stronger players in the house to completely losing all control. Her alliance wasn't even sure they were going to vote together, then they didn't and when Daniele is the one who is calling you on your strategy, then let's just say your powers for manipulation are lacking. Poor Daniele and her 68-pound body sniffed it right out, ratted Kail out to her daddy, and spoiled the big plan.
As Joe sat on the couch with Julie, I realized that he kinda looked like one of the puppets they used in Sound of Music during that "Lonely Goatherd" Song. Lady-o-duh-lady-o-daloo! I'm pretty sure that's German for see ya.
As for the HOH competition, it's the same every week until the final four or five. Meaningless trivia questions about what's happened in the house thus far. Sometimes they have desks, sometimes they stand on podiums, but there are always questions, and they always have a tiebreaker, featuring chalkboards. Until we get the endurance challenges, we get trivia. Oh, well.
Did anyone else catch Daniele's face when the question was asked about whether the animal shrubs were based on work by Michelangelo? I'm pretty sure her thought process was all about trying to figure out which Ninja Turtle that was.
When Dick won, I think I saw Kail go behind one of the "animal shaped topiaries" and throw up. This week will be pretty miserable for her, but entertaining for me. Somehow, I think Dick is going to pull a "Hurricane Howie" only he will be clever in his remarks, not just words that you can't say in front of children and cracks about alleged plastic surgery. I am excited for it. I will be interested to see the HOH room. If you are in there with your estranged daughter do you get pictures of her as well?
As for Am-Eric-A's task, I am begging you to have Am-Eric-A "target" Daniele. It will be the best, most uncomfortable, and entertaining situation ever. He will also probably talk himself right into his own nomination. Hee.
Assuming that Am-Eric-A has to rally for one of the usual suspects, the nominations are gonna be Kail and Jen this week. I am calling it. The real question will be who they vote to evict. It is starting to get good, people.
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Emma Brand is a reality television addict from the South, who thinks that the only bad television is no television. She would love feedback. Her email is sweepthelegjohnny15@gmail.com
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