Big Brother: Zach Needs A Helmet Commentary by Emma Brand September 3, 2007
Watching Zach get his HoH room, did anyone else think Zach's HoH was going to be equipped for the mentally challenged? I know they haven't changed it up each week like last year, but I was thinking something in Nerf furniture, and maybe Zach should just have a helmet there for everyday use. Then he got "individualized note cards" instead of a letter. They were from his brothers, and I am pretty sure that they were written in crayon, but of course, CBS doesn't show us the good stuff. Now that we're on the subject, I am glad that Zach and Amber didn't hook up while they were together, because that would have been one big, dumb baby. Wow, the thought of it just made me a little queasy.
Leading up to Zach's nominations this week, I was hoping he would have a brain storm and put up both Dick and Daniele. He could have made a deal for at least one week without being nominated, if not two for just about every one of the other players.
He could have bought himself so much safety and Dick yelling at him now or whether he's not nominated is the same for Zach, not that anything makes it to his brain through all that hair gel. It didn't matter though.
Zach of course waffled and flip-flopped and had a plan and then reversed it only to flip flop again.
Of course, even Daniele could see the sense that made and she immediately put on her skimpiest bikini to go target Eric and Jessica as the nominees. Of course, she found Zach wrapped up with his pants around his neck and in the pool. If you weren't sure whether Zach was weird, this was your money shot.
Seriously, there he was floating around in a pool that can't be more than a few feet deep with a pair of Wranglers wrapped around his neck. I can't make this stuff up. And the beauty of the game is that Daniele, who must make Zach feel like a 7th-grader who has a crush on his art teacher, has to sit there and talk to Zach as if all of this kind of behavior is not weird at all.
Of course, all of Daniele's strategy falls on deaf ears, being as how his jeans were cutting off the circulation to his head. I am not sure Zach's presence doesn't lower the average IQ points by at least 50 in any room that he walks into.
So Zach nominated Jessica and Jameka. Listening to his speech as to why actually makes me dumber so I pretty much just tuned it out and tried to watch the facial expressions of the nominees. Both of them took it pretty well at the table.
What better way to end a Sunday night than to see Our Player, crying in the diary room? Eric, buddy, grow a backbone. You got yourself into the whole America's Player thing, and I don't think it's very patriotic of you to keep whining and crying, and falling down and losing competitions.
It's times like these when you need to ask yourself what Benjamin Franklin would do. That's right you get yourself a kite and get out in the yard on a rainy day and put the rest of us out of our misery.
Emma Brand is a reality television addict from the South, who thinks that the only bad television is no television. She would love feedback. Her email is sweepthelegjohnny15@gmail.com
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